The way you respond to a person, the way you are present with a person, the way you deal with the emotions the person evokes in you, are all of great importance. Not only for the person you are with, but also for yourself. Scientific research has shown clearly that it’s good for your own physical and mental health when you are able to express loving feelings towards others. So caring for others is also caring for yourself.
You can read or hear from others how you are supposed to do this, but in order to actually do it requires practicing. Only then you can learn to be unconditional loving in an authentic way. In this section of the website some practices you can do are described. There is some logic in the order of the practices. One practice follows the other. But you can also make your own choice where to start.
These practices mainly mental practices, that can help you to increase your mental and emotional defensibility. Practices to increase your non-violent physical defensibility are more difficult to explain in text. Here you may need actual training with the support of a teacher or trainer.
1. Full presence
Learning to be present with a person with full awareness. The goal of this practice is not just to relax (which might be nice), but to get more grip on the turbulence in your own mind.
2. Finding peace in yourself
With this practice you can learn to reload your battery when you are very occupied and you are not able to take a brake because you can’t leave the people alone.
3. Dividing your attention between the other and you
By not focusing fully on the other person, but also a bit on yourself, you can care better for yourself while being in contact with others, and at the same time act give the other what he needs.
4. Dividing your attention between yourself, the other person and the environment
When you are with a person, you may also be responsible for other persons, but this shouldn’t distract you too much
6. Three good principles
Increasing the quality of the interactions and learning how to prevent that you take negative memories from one interaction into the next, and during the day get more and more exhausted.
7. Letting go disturbing emotions
Learning to let go disturbing emotions in an authentic way, so they cannot influence the relationship with the people you serve nor the satisfaction you find in your work.
8. Transforming disturbing emotions
Learning to use the energy of disturbing emotions to help the person unconditionally and thus preventing escalations.
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